If you share your home with a Golden, these will probably hit a little too close to home…
1.
Your socks are never safe. Ever.
Golden Retrievers have a black belt in sock stealing. Doesn’t matter how clean or hidden — if it smells like you, it’s theirs.
2.
That tail? It’s a wrecking ball.
They don’t just wag their tail — they weaponize it. Coffee table cleared? Tail. Kids crying? Tail. Glass of water? You already know.
3.
Privacy? Forget about it.
Golden logic: If you’re in the bathroom, you’re lonely and need support. Immediately.
4.
You never eat alone.
Golden eyes locked on every bite. Bonus points if there’s a trail of drool hitting the floor like a faucet.
5.
You say ‘walk’ too loud, and it’s over.
Even spelling it doesn’t work anymore. They learned that too. W-A-L-K? They heard you.
6.
The shedding is next level.
No outfit is complete without a layer of golden fur. Especially black clothing — they know.
7.
They’re big babies.
Scared of vacuums, thunder, and sometimes… their own farts.